One in four parents won't discipline their children in case it upsets them! A new survey has found that the nation's mums and dads shy away from telling off their kids because they don't want to be seen as unfair or too strict. In fact three in ten parents admitted they were a 'pushover'.
A third of parents admitted avoiding disciplining their child in public because they didn't want others to think they were being too harsh. And more than half of those polled said they disciplined their own child less than their own parents did.
However, in spite of this, more than one in three said they feared a lack of discipline could lead to their child getting into trouble in future.
A spokesman for Cadet150, which carried out the poll of 2,000 parents to mark the 150th anniversary of the cadet forces, said: 'Discipline is all part of growing up and it's important for children that they are taught the difference between right and wrong. It seems children these days get a far easier ride than parents did twenty or thirty years ago. Our survey suggests mums and dads tend to avoid ticking off their children because it's easier than having to deal with them kicking up more of a fuss. They don't want to be seen as too strict and not enough of a friend their kids feel comfortable talking to.'
9 in 10 adults considered themselves to be well-disciplined as a child - with six in ten being smacked, a similar number being sent to their bedroom and almost half being ordered into bed early. 1 in 5 adults said they were banished to bed without dinner, while one in ten had their 'ears boxed' or their mouths washed out with soap. Eight in ten said one telling-off was enough to stop them from misbehaving again
Interestingly, a huge 93% said they grew up respecting their elders and feared a telling off from dad, mum or the teacher.
But the study found that today's kids have a much easier ride. 25% of parents said they openly shied away from telling off their kids because they wanted 'an easy life'. Only three in ten said they had sent their child to bed early while one in three had taken away an iPod or mobile phone or reduced time allowed on computer games. One in ten said they wouldn't give their child a lift somewhere when needed as punishment while one in twenty said they would do 'absolutely nothing'.
More than half of parents felt they were seen more as a friend than a parent and would rather sit down and talk things through than discipline them. The study also found 85 per cent believe youngsters these days have little or no discipline. Amazingly, one in five parents have either been contacted by the school or been subjected to neighbour's comments about their child's 'inappropriate' behaviour.
But the study also highlighted ways in which a child's behaviour could be improved. Half of parents think having a hobby, exercising and being a member of a team would keep youngsters focused and out of trouble. 85 per cent feel that being involved in organised out-of-school activities have made their child a better-rounded person.
A Cadet150 spokesman added: 'Getting involved in exciting and challenging structured activities in their spare time can help children and young people discover the benefits of self-discipline, teamwork and respect for others. Organisations like the cadet forces encourage young people to learn to take responsibility for themselves and others while making friends and having a good time.'
February 2010 |