I suppose I always knew in my heart that there was something different with my son, I know it sounds silly to say it but it's true.

He was sitting on his own at 4 months, crawling about 5 1/2 months and walking at 9 months. His physical side never was an issue, it was other things. I notice that he would never make eye contact and barely looked at your face, I brushed that aside until others noticed it too.

Joseph went to a childminders from 3 months of age and, if I am honest, I barely saw him. I would leave the house at 7asm, dropping him off at the childminders, picking him up just before 7pm and by the time I got him home, he'd be sparkers. Weekends were always a blur, Saturday rolled round and I would be out shopping, home cleaning and again by the time I'd finished all the household chores, he was sparkers again. Sundays was the only day I could relax and spend quality time with my son, I suppose it was a burden a single working mother had the bear but he was never lacking attention. When he was 1yr and 3 months, I lost my job due to the recession and only then did I really notice what was going on with my son.

He was usually quiet and preferred to watch other kiddies play, rather than join in. I quickly noticed that he recognised a lot of places, when we'd go out and that he'd only eat certain coloured foods. I've never been a mum before and no one tells you what is normal for a child, so I took it as a normal thing. Then when he was 18 months old, I started worrying, he hadn't even attempted to talk, his tempers were bad, I was being bitten every day, hit, kicked, things were constantly flying in the house. Jo would even bang his head against the floor when he was in a mood, his tempers ran out of control when he didn't like some i.e. hoover being on or a TV program, wanted channel changed etc. A family friend was working in a disability center with kids and said to me that I should get a GP's opinion, which I did. Our GP referred us to the Dingly Child's center at the Royal Berkshire Hospital and within 1 month, we had his first appointment.

A paediatrician, Child Therapist/Behaviorist and a specialized Dr in the Autism spectrum, were all in attendance. It's usually a 1hr 45 min session but it ran into just over 3hrs. Each profession took it in turns to play with Jo and assess him and also chat to me. Prior to attending, I'd been given questionnaires by the center to fill out in regards to Jo, I filled one out and his nursery did too. I was also interviewed on Jo during this session. The conclusion was that Jo seemed to be at a 10 - 12 month old level in speech and communication, putting him a little over a year behind and 6 - 12 months ahead with his psychical aspects.

I went away and 2 weeks later received the official diagnosis letter, that my son is in the Autism Spectrum but due to his age, they couldn't assess how far along he would be, only that he is on the medium scale. Jo is 2yrs 4 months old.

So from then, I visited the directgov.uk website and requested a disability allowance form for children under 16, I called child tax credit, the ADS etc. As a full time mum, I would be his carer and would be entitled to a certain amount a month, in disability to help towards costs, your child tax credit will also change and you may get slightly more, once you have been approved disability.

I am also attending Makaton courses ( http://www.makaton.org/ ), which is £25.00 for the whole course and pays for the book handout you get (it's very informative and Makaton is a charity organization, so the £25.00 goes towards the printing). Although, I think it's £75.00 for a professional qualification but at the end of the course, whether there to learn for your own child or for a profession, you will still receive a certificate acknowledging that you have participated/passed the course. I am also starting an Early Bird course, which is run by the National Autistic Society (NAS) http://www.nas.org.uk/earlybird, they teach you all about Autism and how to deal with your child etc. I've already met some lovely people through this. My Health Visitor has been very supportive and is currently seeing what else is out there to help me, as I am finding it rather difficult to get by on a daily basis.

Jo attends a nursery twice a week for 2.5hrs a session, which has brought him on leaps and bounds. I am recently finding it a very tough time, I'm doing this all on my own and it isn't easy at all. I can't leave Jo with just anyone, he flips right out, so he goes to my parents if I ever need a sitter. He doesn't eat regularly, maybe every 3 or 4 days he'll eat a proper meal and every day, my kitchen floor and walls look like an artist's canvas I have to deal with constant tantrums, a good 8 or 10 times a day and it takes a good 20 mins a time to calm him down from it, during the process, I end up bitten.

But there is a lot of help out there for me and I just wanted to share that; there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Sorry for rambling on

_________________

Hiya hun.

Thanks for sharing your journey with us.

I think you can sense something as a mother. I have a cousin who is autistic & we noticed from when he was a baby too. Although he also has learning difficulties & is on the high end of the autistic spectrum. He was behind both physically & verbally so it was quite apparent by around 8 months onwards.

I know its not personal experience as such, so I can't pretend to understand how you feel. It still must come as a blow, even though you were kind of expecting it iykwim.

I am so glad that Jo has been diagnosed though. Like you say there is a lot of help out there. The Makaton course sounds fab. I'm sure it'll be a massive help to you both All the best with that & also your disability claim. I am sure with such a devoted mom Joseph will now come on in leaps & bounds & continue to be the happy & gorgeous little boy he's always been

_________________

Thank you

He understood his first Makaton signing yesterday, he now understands 'drink', only taken 3 weeks. Now got to start on the rest

_________________

Brilliant! That's fab news, bless him

_________________

Aw glad he is getting the support he needs.
BTW I'm Fiona or Fee mummy to Ella who is 13 months old. I am a special needs teacher here in EK, and work lots and lots with Autism. Have 2 Autistic children in the class this year - one who is very severe!
Makaton is failry easy to learn - but it can be hard to remember them all - I know! Have you watched Something Special on Cbebbies - although I have had makaton training in school, I find it easier to learn it from Something Special. Also the kids respond really well to the rogramme, and tend to sign more in response to Justin and Mr Tumble!
If you ever need a friendly ear to listen about moans about or Autism, or need some ideas how else to help him, give me a wee shout. It is hard for parents with children who have ASD - no matter where they are on the spectrum!
Quick thought, have you applied for Disability living allowance - you are entitled as well as allowance for your car ( think you qualify for a blue badge but dont quote me on that!) Also is he toilet trained - if not you know you can get his nappies etc free under DLA!
Good luck
xx

_________________

Thanks, will have a look into the nappy thing!

Yeah, I've applied for disability, they received my form start of last week but say it can take 6 weeks to get a decision.

We watch something special every day, Mr Tumble lives in the village next to us and Jo does recognize him and kicks up a big fuss lol I do find myself copying Mr Tumble, rather than showing jo but he finds it amusing lol

We haven't started potty training and I am thinking that I shouldn't start it until he starts talking and has an understanding no rush though. I never heard about the nappies either *thumbs up*

_________________

From experience, many children with Autism find toilet training really difficult and some dont start until about 7 or 8 years old. Some never get there with it, dont worrry about it too much. TBH a decent a supportive school will be happy to help you with toilet training if not achieved by the time he goes.
Honeslty Something Special is the best way for everyone in the family to learn Makaton. I use it daily. Also - long way off I know, but make sure if he is still using Makaton that the school / nursery etc he goes to use it also.
Good luck with it all.
xx

_________________

Hi

I have a son on the Autism Spectrum Disorder range too - like yours he crawled and walked very very quickly but didn't talk until much much later than others - his school have been superb ever since nursery though and he has a one-to-one support worker (he's in Year 1 at mainstream school).

I went through that time when he screamed and screamed for nothing and have left places in tears because of it. However, knocking certain things out of his diet - especially tomato ketchup and baked beans - worked wonders and while he still has his moments - at age six - they're far less frequent.

We now have a three-year-old daughter Rachel as well and she has really brought him on. He doesn't talk much and doesn't use names of other children - except for Rachel!

Adam is toilet trained but gets diarrhoea if he has crisps or chocolate and is fussy about what he will eat - he usually has peapods and gingerbread men for breakfast and he likes chicken so we get some protein into him that way.

I confess, I couldn't cope with Adam screaming at me constantly and resorted to giving him chocolate which gave him diarrhoea, meanwhile I was up with Rachel every night.

So, as my husband hated his job and had been running a mail order business from home anyway, he took over as Adam's main carer and 'went full time' with the business.

I went back to work full time after Rachel (had been part time before that but mum said she couldn't cope with two)and managed to stand back from the situation a bit and figure that the chocolate was causing the diarrhoea - I went back to work for a rest! Papers do not scream at you.

You seem to be doing ok though - fair play to you and just letting you know you are not alone.

post removed by poster

It has been thouroughly tested that Autism is not caused by MMR jags.
Autism is generally genetic, although develops later in some children than others. They are not fully sure of all the causes of Autism, but it is definate it is not MMR. I was really worried about it initially, but working and researching the subject much more fully is allowing me to let Ella get the MMR jags as I know it isn't the cause.
Many people beleive the MMR to be the cause as most of the impairments associated with Autism only become obvious at the same age they would normally receive the jags - ie social interaction etc.

Not all schools use makaton, we used to use signalong and even then it was lipservice we paid to it. We are currently developing the use of Makaton as part of our development plan. Use still use boardmaker on a daily basis. PECS is a means of communication whereby the children can "ask" for what they want using symbols. It doesn't work for every child. Neither is Makaton the soloution for every child. Many cannot co-ordinate the movements to sign correctly. If PECS is working with your child, stick with it as changing and forcing them to learn makaton could confuse them. Just ensure you are following the same way the school do it at home, and that you have boardmaker symbols around the house - ie toilet symbol. This allows to child to continue to communicate even if his communication book is not to hand. Sometimes have smaller symbols attached to yourself when out and about is easier than always having his full communication book. This way if he needs the toilet for example, he can still let you know

Good luck to all with Autism.
xx

_________________