Below are some tips for new parents.
 Don’t end up with one parent doing all the caring and the other doing all the earning unless you really cannot avoid it.
Both spend time alone with your baby.
Both become competent and confident with him/her, learn and appreciate your different parenting styles - your child will.
Mothers: put yourself first sometimes (and fathers – let them do this). Mothers who make the children such a big part of their lives that everything else is forgotten often become depressed.
Fathers: move mountains to get flexible work, even if it gives you only a few extra hours with your baby every week.
Talk and listen. Don't just barge into the role you think is yours – find out if your partner is happy with what your choice means for them. Do they feel put-upon or pushed out by you? Things will then feel fairer, you will be more loving and less stressed – which will also be good for your sex life.
Make time for each other and do things you used to do before you had children. A happy couple relationship means happier children.
Don’t feel guilty about working – nearly all mothers and fathers for all of human history have had to work. Try to organize work so that one of you is looking after the baby as much as possible; babies have always been looked after by several people.
If moving house could mean a smaller mortgage or more involved grandparents, think hard about it.
Each agree to do the one task around the house that the other likes least. If you can afford it, pay for some of the tasks to be done for you.
by
Duncan FisherAbout DuncanI was on my way to the airport when Clare’s first positive pregnancy test came through. I knew then and there that my international work was over for the time being. Since 1997 I have worked from home – and I have raised millions of pounds for different programmes in that time. What is more, I have become a leading campaigner for family and employment policies that let both mums and dads “have it all” – good work AND the opportunity to be close to their children.
* I was nominated a Working Family Champion 1979-2009 by the leading charity, Working Families in 2009
* I served for three years on the Board of the Equal Opportunities Commission, the UK’s Government body responsible for gender equality
* I have worked with Government and industry on family friendly work
* I founded and was CEO of the Fatherhood Institute, putting the spotlight on men as parents
* I got an OBE for services to children from the Queen in 2009
But most significantly: I DID IT ALL WORKING FROM HOME! Why? Because I want to be as fully involved as possible in the lives of my children. We all live in the Brecon Beacons National Park in Wales, and the grandparents live close by. In a recent survey of happiness in the UK, our region came out top for all of the UK. And our local pub keeps getting nominated Pub of the Year UK!
My TOP TIP for time with children: for each child, organise two special weekends, one just with mum and one just with dad. Start as soon as breastfeeding is over. (And then try to get in a weekend with just mum and dad!)
Duncan has written a book called Baby’s Here! Who Does What? (How to split the work without splitting up).
You can buy the book from www.amazon.co.uk or www.WhoDoesWhatBook.com | 
Second Child Treated Differently To First Child
