Conflicting advice and peer pressure leaves new parents spending the first year feeling confused and isolated.
A new study says that two thirds of new parents worry they are not looking after their baby properly – and more than four in five say conflicting advice from family, books and the media only makes life harder.
Aviva’s UK Life commissioned the ‘0 to 12 months study’ to investigate the impact of the first year after birth on the lives of new parents. The study found that the pressures and strains of this busy time can often lead to problems for couples.New Mums' WorriesThe study reveals a lack of confidence among new mums, with over half worrying they don’t appear as confident as other parents, while 45% worry their partners don’t think they are coping. New parents also wilt under the watchful eyes of their mothers-in-law, with six in ten struggling when she corrects their mistakes.
An average of just six hours sleep per night adds to the exhaustion of an endless cycle of baby tasks in the first year that sees new parents:
 change 2,007 nappies
feed the baby 1,789 times
and do 280 loads of washing
Just 14% manage to spend quality time with their partner each day and the strain takes it toll with the average couple arguing an average six times per month. All those nappies and washing machine loads also have an impact on intimate relations, with nearly a third of parents having sex less than once a month in the first year and two thirds falling asleep at least once during the day due to exhaustion.
Seven in ten new mums feel isolated being home alone, with over half thinking any visitors are only there to see the baby. In fact, 57% worry that their partner and friends now find them boring.
The study also reveals that:
81% new parents say holding their baby for the first time was the best moment of the first year
41% buy parenting guide books
23% bought the latest baby gadgets – and then never used them
53% did not manage a night out with friends in the first year
For six in ten new parents, however it’s financial fears and a reduced household income that make the first year so hard.
Louise Colley, from Aviva, said: “The arrival of a new baby signals a complete change in lifestyle and, while the first year of a new baby’s life is one of the most special, it’s also one of the toughest times for parents. Friends and family are well-meaning with their advice, but it seems that sometimes this adds to the pressure and leaves new mums and dads suffering a crisis of confidence.”
August 2009
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The Very Hungry Caterpillar
