'Imagine yourself in the worst place possible, double it and times it by infinity and you will still not be able to comprehend the inconsolable grief of losing a much wanted baby, unless you have been to that place!'
Sands, the stillbirth and neonatal death charity, has published a new support book - Distant Dreams - written by Gary and Becky Seaman, parents of baby Danielle who died as a result of clinical negligence. Their book, explains the emotional journey they went through in coming to terms with the death of Danielle, following mismanagement of Becky's labour and delivery.
Incredibly, every day in the UK 17 babies are stillborn or die within their first month of life - this equates to almost 6,500 babies dying every year. This figure is 10 times more than that of babies who are lost to sudden infant death in the UK.
Gary explains, 'Becky suffers from endometriosis and polycystic ovaries and we were always aware that having children may not come easily, so were overjoyed with the news she was expecting. Nothing prepares you for leaving hospital without your newborn baby. We wanted to share our experiences of the birth and death of Danielle in the hope that our story could bring some comfort to others. I had always harboured a desire to write a novel and by suffering this tragedy it inspired me to put pen to paper. By changing our names to James and Abigail it gave me the artistic freedom to distance myself from reality, whilst still ensuring that a true historical record of the circumstances as to why Danielle is not with us remains the focal point of the story.
'The NHS Trust involved admitted full responsibility for clinical errors relating to Danielle's death, but writing 'Distant Dreams' has enabled me to move on. Distant Dreams' will also, we hope, provide an insight into the ripple effect the loss of a child has on all aspects of people's lives including their emotional wellbeing, their ability to work and the financial implications such an unforeseen tragedy can lead to.'
Gary and Becky's second daughter, Phoebe Georgina, was born at the same hospital as Danielle in October 2005 and as Gary says, 'Finally, the birth of Phoebe has meant our distant dream has come true.' Becky made the brave decision to go back to the same hospital because she felt that other hospitals would not know that mismanagement of her labour led to Danielle's death.'
'Distant Dreams' is available on the Sands Website for £9.99.
About Sands
Sands is a national charity, established by bereaved parents in 1981.
Sands core aims are to:
 Support anyone affected by the death of a baby;
To work in partnership with health professionals to improve the quality of care and services offered to bereaved families; and
To promote research and changes in practice that could help to reduce the loss of babies' lives
Helpline: 020 7436 5881
Office: 020 7436 7940
Web: www.uk-sands.org
E mail: support@uk-sands.org
Look at our StillBirth and NeoNatal Death Section
30 January 2008 | 
SANDS - Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Charity
